A message from Sandy. Remember this animal from Dr.Dolittle? The pushmi-pullyu. The challenge this animal faced was they had no tail, but a head at each end, and no matter which way you came towards him, he was always facing you.

We’ve all heard the quote, “too many chiefs and not enough Indians,” which has a similar problem. So how do you handle a situation where there is too much push or too much pull?

Pushing can take on many different aspects, from forceful pushing to a gentler slower movement. Think about your team, are you pushing to hard and to directly, or not enough? Consider what happens when you push someone. What do they do?…….. They brace themselves for what’s coming, or prepare to push back, and then they do push back.

Think about your team again, you are interested in having them change towards adopting some new principles, techniques, methodologies, or skills–do you have a tendency to push? To be to emphatic, zealous, excited, energetic, insistent, impatient, any of these ringing a bell? Are you pushing more and more, little by little? How does your team react?

Be aware of creating resistance through pushing. Consider whether it is more effective to lean on your team rather than to push them. Your challenge is to find out when you are pushing your team members to hard. ( How about gradual guiding nudges?) How do you look for those vital clues that will tell you,……. hold on not so fast, or let them do it themselves, or give them some time to process? Do you have any thoughts of some significant clues you should all be on the look out for that would indicate you have become to pushy or aggressive?

How about:

• When people start pushing back….
• When people start avoiding having conversations with you….
• When people start arguing with you, even when they seem to agree….
• When you find yourself having to explain or justify at length….
• Add your own